The Unconditional Adoration of Adventure the Cat
I have finally come to accept the unconditional adoration of my hooman authorities. It hasn’t been easy. They want to pet me way too many times every day and I have no choice but to push their hands away – gently as I did come to care for them a little – when they exaggerate.
My new life is very different from my old one, mostly because now I have enough time to tend to my purrfect ebony fur and get as much to eat as I like. I only had to throw up twice to let my hoomans know they had failed in buying the food of my liking. It only took them a few more tries to figure out what my favorite food was.
They are a bit reluctant to provide me with the amount of dry food I expect, but I suspect they think it is not healthy for me. Hypocrites! They stuff their faces with chips and other dry snacks and expect me to only eat wet food. Fortunately, they pay attention to my commands and finally managed to understand that I do require them to feed me that delicious dry food I love so much. All I have to do is be ‘cute’ as they say and they will shower me with all the love and attention I want. Sometimes more than I want. Hence the pushing away of hands and occasional scratching and biting.
The birds on the roof told me some cats don’t have it as great as I do and have to hunt for their food more than once every day. They say most hoomans are not fond of cats, although why that is, I cannot fathom. There is no superior creature to my species. We should all be adored and showered with gifts. The birds also told me most hoomans wouldn’t share their own food with their furry friends so I guess I should now be thankful to my guardians for always indulging me in this respect and making me a throne to be on the same level as them when we eat (even though I am obviously superior to them so I should have an even taller throne). The birds say I should be thankful they didn’t leave me to starve on top of that mountain and the least I can do is act like an adorable little kitty from time to time. I don’t mind being adorable as it comes naturally to me. But I do expect my hoomans to put out (food, to be specific). I will do almost anything for food. Except let them rub my belly. Or let them pet me anytime they want. Or let them sleep past 6 in the morning. But other than that, I’m fine to do whatever.
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